Dealing with Fear And Doubt
Hello, how are you?
In this blog post, I wanted to share my top tips for feeling with fear and doubt. I have had a lot of this creeping in lately and I’ve also noticed it a lot over in the Hub with some of our members, so wanted to share my tips with you to help you out.
Lately, I have been pushing myself out of my comfort zone and have found some fear and doubt creeping in. I am growing behind the scenes and hitting new levels with several projects on the go, but I feel like I’ve hit my ceiling in terms of my comfort zone. Pushing through is key, as growth is inevitable, so finding how to cope and neutralise the fear and doubt, is key.
I see fear and doubt not only in myself but in my kids, my friends, family and members inside the Hub. It’s all around us so it is important that we learn to deal with it and overcome it.
Lots of questions come with doubt like…
- What if nobody buys my work?
- What if nobody reads my book?
- What if the buyers don’t like my work when they receive it?
- What if people say horrible things about me or my work?
- What if I under-price my work?
- What if I don’t succeed?
- What if I look stupid?
- What if I am just not cut out for this?
- Am I good enough?
- What if I don’t have the skills I need?
- What if I lose the house because money is so bad right now?
- What if we can’t afford to feed the kids?
These are elements of doubt and fear that I have felt at some point and have overcome. I am sure you have had some similar fears at some point. Maybe you are feeling some of these now?
One fear that I am hearing a lot of over in the Hub, is that artists are terrified to create a piece of art and the buyer does not like it when they receive it. It’s crippling to some and it is preventing them from growing and putting themselves out there. They aren’t taking commissions as this feeling is overtaking them. So what is the best way to deal with it?
Tip one – opposites
When I start to feel the fear and become scared, I say it out loud. ‘I’m scared that they are not going to like my work when they receive it’. If I can, I will write this thought down. When you get something out of your head, say it out loud or write it down, it gives you perspective. All of sudden that fear does not seem so bad.
Then, once I have written it down I will write down the opposite to that fear. For example:
- What if they don’t like the artwork when they receive it?
So then the opposite of this would be;
- What if they love the artwork when they receive it?
It’s so simple and starts to give you perspective on your element of fear. As soon as you say the opposite, it starts to neutralise the fear you are feeling. It stops the mind from escalating.
Tip two – find a solution
Every problem has a solution – this is something I say to my kids all the time. If something goes wrong, how can you fix it? Doing the same with fear and doubt is really powerful.
Going back to our example, what if that person doesn’t like my work when they receive it? How can you fix this or prevent this from happening? A process normally will be the solution. Asking your client at the beginning, do you like the sketch? The next process will be the outline. We can talk about this once it’s done. Ask them about colours and keep going back and forth so revisions can be made to eliminate that fear.
By the time you hand the artwork over, you’ve been in contact with the buyer and it’s not such a big surprise and will alleviate the issue in your mind from happening.
Tip three – acceptance
Keeping in mind that the worst can happen, accept it but know in your mind that you can cope. Write it down too. If this does happen, how will you cope with it?
So, if the situation appeared where the buyer didn’t like the artwork, accept it but learn from it. Put your hands up and say, right, I made some mistakes here but that is okay. I can cope with this outcome and move forward from it.
Saying those words, I can cope is essential. Keep saying them in your head to help improve your mindset.
It may take some to perfect doing this, but that’s okay. It has taken me years to reframe these thoughts of fear and doubt. When these feelings creep in, stop…
- Look at the opposites to your fear – they then won’t feel so bad.
- Have a solution in mind.
- Accept it and repeat, ‘I can cope’.
- Write all of this down and go back to it when these feelings become overwhelming.
Always remember, nothing is that bad it can’t be fixed. You can move forward and learn lessons from every situation and turn them all into positives.
I really hope these tips help you in someway or another.